Dressing Up

I hear parents talking about how expensive school dances are. The dress, the hair, the shoes, etc.

The year I spent the most on my daughter's dress for her high school's homecoming dance was the year that she was most disappointed in how she looked. The first year, she was a freshmen, therefore not technically eligible to go the dance, except as someone's date. So we did not have a lot of advance notice for shopping. We looked all over town, found a dress we could live with, and paid full price for it. We weren't the only ones. There were a couple of other people at the dance in the very same dress.

The next year, planning ahead a bit, we found a dress in an outlet store in Branson, and spent $35. Much better. Much cheaper. And no one else had one.

This year, I found a vintage dress at a Goodwill. The price? $12.

The result?



The best she's looked yet. I did her hair, because a $4 can of Aquanet makes up for a lack of skills on my part. The necklace is vintage rhinestones, from when I was in school. She wore a pair of black pumps that she already had.

Including the boutonniere for the boy, the hairspray, the pins & combs for her hair, and the new eyeshadow, and the earrings that she didn't end up wearing, I spent less than $40.

Thrift stores are full of beautiful formals. Some take a bit of imagination, although nothing so drastic as Pretty in Pink. Some need a trip to the cleaners. And, truthfully, it helps if the person you're dressing is thin, as I have not seen a wide selection of fabulous size 16 dresses looking for a home. But taking time to look through those racks can show gems hidden among polyester satin monstrosities.

Recession Fabulous Giveaway!

So what’s better than free? Not much! Which is why I’m introducing you all to Mary Beth Hunt, aka the Everyday Cheapskate, by giving away her hardcover book, The Everyday Cheapskate Greatest Tips, which is chock FULL of ideas for smarter spending and living. Post a comment between now and September 25 right here on Recession Fabulous and you’ll be entered in the drawing.

I'm also letting you know that if you go to Mary Beth's website, you’ll not only get to read all of her articles, archived, but you’ll also be able to sign up for her FREE email newletter, which includes a daily cheapskate tip. These aren’t the usual tips you’ve heard a hundred times, either, but original doable ideas.

No, I’m not her agent, I just like her outlook. Go check her out.
Oh, and by the way, if you’re interested in more free books that you don’t even need to win a contest for, check out my E-reader experiment here.

Good Eating in Hard Times

Let's get something straight before we start: I don't like to cook. As home chores go, I prefer laundry. But, with a husband and three kids, we can't afford to eat out all the time, either, even at "family" restaurants, like Dixie Cafe.

I have a bit of a love/hate relationship with Dixie Cafe, anyway. Eating there kind of reminds me of eating at my granny's house. On the other hand, I'm pretty sure my granny could feed a field full of hay-hauling teenagers for what it costs to feed a family of five at Dixie Cafe. At Dixie Cafe, for $8.79, I can get "platter" or chicken fried steak, two vegetables and a bread. Instead, I make this at home, and it doesn't take much longer than making the kids presentable, driving across town, waiting for a table, placing an order and getting food. Even if your cooking skills are minimal, you can do this.

I buy "country fried steak" in a box of 10, with two packages of white gravy at Sam's Club for about $11. Those taste great baked in the oven in cast-iron skillet. And, let's be real: that is the same chicken-fried steak that most restaurants serve anyway. If you put half of that in the freezer for another night, so far our cost is about $6.50.

Buy a bag of potatoes for $4-$5. Scrub them, and cut them up and put them on to boil. When they get done, "mash" them with the mixer, peelings and all. Add a couple of tablespoons of butter, a glug of milk, and a dab of salt. Or, do it the easy way with instant potatoes. With the white gravy, no one will be able to tell the difference anyway, especially if you use real butter. So far, we are still less than $10 total expense to feed a family of five a meal.

Add your favorite fresh or frozen vegetable, and a bag of rolls. You are still less than $15, and the only thing you really had to cook were the potatoes.

Add a gallon of sweet tea from Kroger and you are good.


Laura

Image from: http://www.flickr.com/photos/kb35/ / CC BY 2.0

Pound that Bride

Getting married is so expensive. It's a wonder anyone can get hitched at all, especially in these lean times. Not that you'd know it watching "reality" television - ever clicked past Bridezilla? There's a perfect example of folks with too little to spend trying too hard to spend it anyway. What a train wreck. No wonder those poor women are 'zillas.

I say place the emphasis on getting a house and filling it up. Looking back (waaaay back) I remember jumping through the fiery hoops of bridal shower etiquette to receive scads of presents I hardly ever used. Nothing like eating mac and cheese on the Lennox china for a year.

My old roommate in college was from a tiny speck of a town down in southern Arkansas. She lived so far out in the sticks that, if I remember correctly, her summer job was baling hay. When she decided to marry (far below her, as many educated country gals do) the whole town gave the wedding couple an old fashioned pounding.

No, they weren't beaten with sticks. Pounding Parties go way back, especially in the country where folks had no need of fine things and great need for everyday survival. Sharing from the Heart: Tips from a Crone defines it simply,

This custom dates back to pioneer days, and was practiced widely. I don't know its origins, but it's something we should continue today.

When a couple got married and set up housekeeping, it was customary to have a "pounding party". This meant that each guest brought a pound of something: flour, salt, butter — whatever was needed to stock a house — in order to give their friends a good start on their new life.

My old roommate's Pounding Party was a whole-community event where tables groaned with covered-dish specialties and kids ran everywhere. She and her lousy husband-to-be received boxes and grocery bags full of cleaning supplies, mops, canned goods, and rice. There were also plenty of envelopes stuffed with small bills - always a handy gift for couples just starting out.

One woman even presented her with a whole sack of daylilly bulbs dug fresh from her own garden that very morning. Can you imagine anything sweeter?

It was a big party and when it was over, they had everything but the house to set up house. They were also woven into the fabric of her hometown. What a lovely way to begin, even with a bum.

(Want to throw an old-fashioned Pounding Party? E-How has a nice list to get you started. )

From Monda at No Telling, who's had a couple of really nice weddings herself.

Back-to-School Savvy

You don't have to be a kid to benefit from the dramatic loss leaders that populate most back-to-school sales. I take advantage of them every year to stock up on my own office supplies. Fine line colored markers, for example, are always handy to have around and you can't beat a buck or so for a set of Crayola's that are normally $2-3 the rest of the year.

Here are some other tips on getting the most out of back to school sales:

• Holiday and birthday gifts. The artists in your lives, young or old, will enjoy receiving new markers, drawing pencils, sharpeners, and so on, all of which can be had for pennies this time of year. Go ahead, make up an arts supply basket even.


• Stocking stuffers. Load up those 25 cent boxes of crayola crayons and dollar marker sets now--loved ones will enjoy finding them in their stockings.


• Birthday party favors. I discovered this one years ago, as both my kids have birthdays in August, prime back-to- school deal time. School supplies, most of which can be had for pocket change this time of year, make great birthday party favors. Even if your kid's birthday is in February, pick up a baker's dozen of crayolas, pencils and mini-compositions books now, tuck them away (remember where you put them though) and you'll be all set to fill those goody bag with fun, useful items with party time rolls around. Besides, parents will thank you for sparing them the clutter of another noisemaker or cheap plastic yo-yo. (P.S. Keep an eye out for five for a dollar pencil cases, and you can even substitute them for the party bags themselves.)

(By StephanieV, who blogs at Wordamour)

Wondering when it's time to say good-bye.

Last week, one of my favorite bracelets broke as I was putting together the perfect look. I gathered its many parts from all over the floor and left them in a small, discrete pile atop my dresser, where they've been sitting ever since. Do I throw them out, or do I try and repair/restring the bracelet? If the bracelet is made of pearls and handed down from your great-grandmother, then the answer is fairly obvious.

But what if it's a 15-dollar faux coral number picked up on sale at Nordstroms?

It's a dilemma I face all the time--whether to spend the time and energy on repairing something that is past its prime, or whether I sacrifice it to the gods of consumerism. There's that beautiful orange leather bag that everyone so admired but that is now really beginning to show its age; there are those delicately-pointed shoes that make my ankles look like a girls' but whose heels are run down and uneven; there's that sweater in the same shade of blue as my eyes that also has an ugly moth hole on the front placket.

I'm a modern girl, on the run. I'm not made of money, but surely I've got enough to replace a worn purse, down and out shoes, and a holey sweater? Things may be tight, but I don't want to look like a Dorothea Lange photo.

One of my most prized possessions is a stack of love letters written by my grandparents to one another during the summer before they married. The year was 1935, and times were hard all over--but especially in the rural South. Turning one of these letters over, you can see that my grandmother has written her endearments on the back of an old homework assignment--a fairly well-rendered cell diagram. Grade? A+.

It's hard to imagine now, but when my grandparents were corresponding, even paper and pens were hard to come by. Only the rich, foolish, or wasteful could afford to send a letter with blank pages on the back. I know from their contents that my grandmother wrote her letters with a tiny stub of pencil, hidden from her sisters and sharpened with a kitchen knife.

This letter is my favorite, because, while I might be persuaded that my kindly, country grandma had once been someone's note-writing inamorata, it's almost impossible for me to imagine her ever having any inkling of the concepts of molecular biology. This document would likely not have survived, had it not been on the reverse of one of her love letters. But because it has, I have a more complete picture of my grandmother--as a girl in love, a scholar, a labeler of ribosomes and mitochondria.

Oddly enough, I think of this whenever I make an old favorite ready for another run around the block. A little saddle soap to remove the ink from a leather purse, a trip to the shoe repair shop to resole my shoes, and both are--if not quite good as new--perhaps good enough to see me through another semester. A pretty floral applique covers a moth hole. Obviously, none of these compare with the level of frugality my grandmother knew, but will any survive me and give future generations a picture of the woman who once owned them?

Probably not.

But you never know. Someday my great-granddaughter may find the bracelet I've restrung with a strand of dental floss. She'll hold it up for her own children to see, and she'll say, "Great-grandma had lovely taste in costume jewelry. You can see how she restrung this herself, back in the recession of 09. Of course, this would have been back when she still had all her own teeth."

image, Ibison4's Flickr photostream.

Posted by Deb, who blogs mostly regular at mundanejane.com.

The Dry Cleaner's Daughter: "Hang It Up!"

I practically grew up in the household of my mother’s mother—a strong-willed “Arky” who had made it through the murder of her first husband (lesson: don’t play around with the bootlegger’s wife), the Great Depression, and WWII as a Rosie the Riveter, whose duty on the assembly line was to load bombs with explosive material. When I stayed at her house, I had several “chores”: hoe the garden, iron Grandpa’s handkerchiefs (I think this was just to keep me away from real clothes), and pull the clothes off the line. Because my grandmother had worked for my dad and his parents in their dry cleaners as a seamstress before my folks were even married, I think she sort of groomed me to take care of clothes. So it’s funny to me that I loved to iron when I was really young: I would grow to hate it with a passion in plenty of time. But this isn’t about ironing—which I still refuse to do, recession be damned.

If you want to save a little money, help the environment, get some exercise, and mess with the fussbudgets in your covenant neighborhood, I’ve got your answer: buy a retractable clothesline and some clothespins.

I know you know this, just as well as I know the reason you aren’t doing it: line drying makes your clothes stiff and rough, right? Not if you do it properly. There are several secrets to line drying : here’s my foolproof method, gleaned from lessons from my dad and my grandmother:

1. Make sure you buy a plastic, retractable clothesline. Plastic lines can be “washed” periodically by extending and fastening them and then wiping them, all the way around, with a wet, soapy rag. Since they’re retractable, they get less dirty (and keep you from violating covenant rules or city code—if you’re fortunate enough to live out in the country, you don’t have this problem, lucky you).
2. Wash your clothes. I recommend a liquid detergent because it won’t leave “soap streaks” on your darker clothing. You probably only need ½ to ¾ of the manufacturer’s recommended amount—experiment. If you want extra savings, use washing powders on your lighter-colored fabrics and liquid on the darker ones.
3. Dry your clothes, with a fabric softening sheet, in the dryer for 7 minutes. That’s right, put your clothes in the dryer BEFORE you put them on the line. This is the most important step because this is what will keep them feeling soft and comfortable. The softener sheet can be re-used like this several times. Once the softening agent is exhausted, the sheets can be used for dusting the top of the dryer and the lint screen.
4. Hang your clothes on the line is such a way that you’ll avoid obvious line marks. I like to put shirts on plastic hangers (which I got free from the stores where I purchased my more expensive clothing). If they’re woven shirts, I stretch them out a bit to save me the trouble of having to iron them (don’t do this with knits). I usually hang shorts by folding them over the line on the seat seam.
5. Find a spot in the shade to dry your clothes, preferably NOT under a tree (unless you consider bird poop a fashion accessory). Direct sun can damage your clothes worse than bleach, so avoid it if you can. If you can’t, be sure to take your clothes down as soon as they’re dry.

Voilà, you’re done! Next post: “Spots 101, Part I.”

Posted by Jennifer. Visit my mid-life blog at Life in the Fast Lane.

A Cardboard Box and a Free Afternoon

When I was young there was nothing so fun as a whole afternoon and a fresh cardboard box. It still takes very little to keep me entertained. I get this from my mother, who once made an entire play-kitchen for me from a series of found boxes and a little poster paint. Move over, Little Tikes.

Everyone has the Christmas or birthday story involving a Very Expensive Present of some sort and the child who ignores it to play with the box instead. There's a reason for this. As much as we love our kids and want them to have the best of everything, they love making something from nothing. And a cardboard box is just about nothing. Ultimately, it's not just about saving money on toys, it's about creativity.

Nothing is more versatile than a cardboard box. It's an indoor and outdoor toy, it's a fort or a jewelry box. It's a blank canvas and a place to sit and think. An empty cardboard box is possibility.

I did a little searching and had a good laugh over the modern version the Box as Toy. If you use a credit card to buy an $18 (plus shipping, I assume) eco-friendly box online, I believe you might be part of the problem instead of the solution. Don't, I repeat, don't be silly and buy a special box online. Go to a local store or - better yet - a place where they sell appliances. Ask for a box. Done.

Then give it to your kids. There's no need to tell them what to make or "guide their play." The whole point of the box is figuring out what it should be. Providing crayons is fine, box cutters are not. If it's killing you, get your own box and fill the afternoon making your own creation. If it's still killing you, then you have control issues I can't help you with here. Let. It. Go.

While I strongly advocate a real box, in a pinch you can visit The Box Doodle Project and have a blast online. Also free.

Note: You don't need the excuse of parenthood to goof off with a cardboard box. Instead of spending yourself into a night on the town, have some friends over, supply the boxes and maybe a bottle of wine. A little cheap creativity goes a long way and it's infinitely better than worrying over bills or watching American Idol.

Got a cardboard box idea? Leave it in the comments so we can all play!

Classroom-Fabulous

One of my favorite Recession stories this week concerns a high school history teacher in Idaho who's selling advertising space on tests. This isn't for personal gain, folks, he's just struck a deal with a local pizza delivery place that's willing to provide copy paper for the classroom - as long as there's a promotional coupon at the bottom of each page. Is this appalling? I don't think so, and neither does his school district. Budget cuts are dastardly, and every little bit helps.

If you know someone who teaches in the public schools, then you know how much hard-earned cash they plunk down out of their own pockets every year, Recession or not. Believe me, there's a reason why most states give teachers a small tax deduction to reimburse for out-of-pocket classroom expenses. Here in Arkansas the deduction is $250, a drop in the bucket, really, especially for those sainted elementary teachers who likely spend that much on construction paper alone.

I've traveled the back roads of Arkansas giving poetry workshops and such, and learned quickly to bring my own chalk and markers. Nothing new around here, so my hat's off to this enterprising history teacher. He's not only stretched his classroom budget, he's teaching his students something important about financial creativity.

I wonder if he's tested those kids over the Great Depression yet?

It Must Be Tuesday. She's Wearing that Gray Skirt.

I remember moving out on my own a few (cough) years ago and my father sitting down with me to teach me monthly budgeting. His list involved scribbling down all the necessities to stay alive and a lot of math. Bless his heart, he meant well. I was young, though, and paid almost no attention until he wrote down "clothing."

The only math I ever truly learned was how to make all those other pesky columns (electricity, gas, phone, rent, food) less so I could punch up the clothing budget.

I learned a lot back then by trial and error. Yard sales, sewing, second-hand stores, careful bartering and sale-watching kept me covered well enough to splurge once in a while on something at full-price. Money was tight for sure back then, but this recession has given fresh meaning to "too broke."

There's a world of difference between 18 and 40-mumble. Children's needs come first. Actually, everything seems to come first and it's easy to find yourself at the tail-end of the budget list. Comes with the territory.

The bottom line is you have ten dollars, maybe twenty, and you've got to be resourceful. I've scoured the internet and found hundreds of sites dedicated to saving money on clothes during These Dark Times. Most of them told me what I already knew, and the rest of them were intent on appeasing my need for $400 designer handbags by catching one on sale for $200. Those folks are in serious denial, but they won't be for long.

This is going to hurt, but I must give it to you straight: You can't have the handbag. You can't even want the $400 handbag, because no act of God or mercy is going to make that handbag cost $20. You don't need it. Let it go.

The one thing you must never do is go to some discount store and buy cheap, nasty clothes just because you can. No need uglying up your closet with crap. Hit the yard sales first and Ebay second.

Yard sale buying doesn't mean you have to park your dignity at the curb. Scout out the yard sale section in the local newspaper (which has probably gone online-only now) and look for sales in the good neighborhoods. Map it out so you're not burning up too much gas. Better yet, invite a few friends and carpool. Make it a lark. Laugh a lot and carry coffee cups with lids and gossip deliciously. At each stop, be sure to hit the accessories as well as the clothing. Look for nice labels and fresh dry cleaning tags. Barter sweetly. The important thing is to arrive with $20 in your pocket and spend only that.

Ebay is a maze you must traverse carefully, but a good place to find what you want at a steal. Ever hear the one about the $140 J. Jill skirt I found for $2 and free shipping? Oh, the stories I could tell. It's all about how you set up your searches. Narrow them for specific brands, sizes, and even colors. Always be sure to check the measurements for each item, though. There's no use in buying a Jones of New York blouse just to find it won't, um, button.

Both of these methods take time, but they're fun. Isn't that a nice bonus? If you're simply too exhausted from working three jobs and creating fabulous dinners, I suggest a fashion shortcut. Buy a nice necklace. Your co-workers may still be able to tell what day of the week it is by which outfit you're wearing, but they'll be momentarily dazzled by a new set of beads. My grandmother once told me that if you walk really fast and with purpose, no one will know your pearls aren't real.

Fabulous words to live by.